black & blue

may 5, 2001

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Mood

 I'm experiencing a weird low. I've been frustrated at myself. I believe that it's futile to do something about the problem, yet at the same time I'm trying to keep my hopes up.

I told you it was weird.

Going back

 During high school, I was one of the computer geeks of the batch. It was like I had a large sign painted in front of me: "Computer Know-it-all." I was never really bothered by the somewhat prejudicial image they had of me.

That is, until I graduated.

When you enter a room full of strangers on your first day of college, the first realization is that you're no longer weighed down by your high school image. Then, you proceed to befriend those strangers who would be your blockmates (hopefully) until the end of college.

Afterwards, you realize that you've been acting the same way as you did in high school. You've just put that "Computer Know-it-all" sign in front of you once more.

You had the opportunity, you had the potential— and you totally ignored it.

Exactly what happened to me.

Am I?

 The question that always crops up in my mind is: am I really that?

I've grown cynical when it comes to asking people about what they think of me. Probably because I'm too stubborn to change my perception about who I am.

That's life.

Pigs and sago

  I bought a bootlegged copy of the Radioactive Sago Project's self-titled album. I know, I know. I'm supposed to stop patronizing pirated products. But consider the price difference: PhP 90 for the pirated issue compared to PhP 250 for the real deal.

Their music reminds me of another band I've listened to. This other band, a Chicago-based group named Liquid Soul, has a funky sound that the Radioactive Sago Project seems to mimic.

They've been in the music scene for sometime. It was only when I heard Gusto Ko Ng Baboy that I got introduced to their sound. Jazz, funk, and punk rock.

Finally, a Filipino band that I can listen to.

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